The First Hole

Tee it up, check the height,
check the wind,do it right.
I really want a good hit for a start.

Check my grip and my stance,
don't leave anything to chance.
I know this is the easy part.

It's going straight towards the green,
thats the best I've ever seen.
Didn't know that i could golf that good.

Hit the next one fat, caused a popper
not very far, a little hopper.
Didn't go where I thought it should.

I just love these little chips,
son-of-a-gun, I got the yips
didn't go very near the cup.

Need a putt that's soft and easy,
but my stomach's getting queasy,
keep going ball, shucks, it just gave up.

Lined up the putt with practiced eye.
it looked in as it went by.
It was really close, but no cigar.

Well, two more putts and now its in.
Really seems a mortal sin,
to settle for a bogie on this little three par.

~Karl W. Jansen 1/9/09

(and one week later - an explanation)

That golf poem Mother sent to everyone
I wrote just to have a lttle fun.
I expected a sharp retort
I made a travesty of a royal sport,
I led you down the primrose path.
Read it again and do the math.
I might tell a little lie to the unwary
If to make me look good, I felt it necessary.